Darkest Days
by Hikari Moriyaku
Summary: When she returns, she finds that her beloved has fled. Upon finding him, he breaks her heart, sending her back to the way she used to be. Can anything be done to solve this and what about Aidan? .Sequel to Mind of a Psychic.R
1. youve got to learn to face your fears

OMG I AM BAAAAACK! LET'S ALL REJOICE!  
It's been a long ass time since I last wrote and/or updated a Teen Titan's story!

Well, here's the sequel to the shitty story of Mind of A Psychic. I suggest not reading it. Basically, BB&Raven shipper here. Big battle. Raven leaves. That's all you really need to know.

I would love R&R! OH! And read my fiancee's story "War Birds". It's kick ass.

The song is When I'm Dead - Stabbing Westward

**Disclamer**: I do not own the Teen Titans, but I own Aidan and the story. Also, all lyrics in this story are going to be by Stabbing Westward. I don't own them, but if I did, they would still be around. Obviously. BB&&RAE! KEEP THE FUCKING FAITH!

**Chapter One: **_youve got to learn to face your fears_

It was a dark night in Jump City. The town was quiet. People suffled about doing their normal holiday shopping. Oh, did I mention that it was Christmas? Snow lightly fell to the ground giving the streets a light powder. People hustled along trying their best to stay warm in the freezing cold. All was peaceful. Well, until the alarm at the Best Buy went off. There were a couple of gun shots followed by screaming.

"Give me all of your money! And...and and a blue iPod. HURRY!" the gunman shouted, holding his gun against the head of a very frightened cashier.

She screamed, tears falling from her eyes, but she did what she was told. Suddenly the door burst open. Four adults entered the room. One was a large half metal man, a sonic canon on his arm charged and pointed at the gunman. A girl with pink hair stood behind him, a smirk on her face. Another girl floated slightly in the air. Her hands seemed to give off an eerie green glow as her starbolts surrounded them. The last, their leader, stood ready with his bowstaff in hand.

"Unhand her!"

The gunman seemed surprized. He immediately pulled the frightened cashier in front of him and kept the gun pointed at her head.

"STAY BACK OR I'LL KILL HER!"

"You shall not do such a horrible thing!" the floating girl said.

"Come on, man. Don't do somethin stupid," added in the cyborg.

"Titans, GO!" yelled the leader.

The gunman instantly ran for the backdoor, screaming in histerics.

"I think it's time for a little bad luck," said the girl with pink hair.

She stretched out her arms, sending pink blasts up into the ceiling. Instantly, a few bars came crashing down. The gunman managed to avoid them as they hit the ground, nearly taking out a display of computers. The floating girl had taken their leader by the hands and flung him as hard as she could at the gunman. He knocked him to the ground. The gun went flying a few feet away.

"Don't hurt me! It's Christmas! I just wanted to get my little girl an iPod!" the man screamed, trying to protect himself from some unknown death blow. "Please, Robin! Have mercy!"

Robin smirked, cuffing the man's hands together.

"There isn't any mercy in jail."

The cops came in after that. They thanked the Titans before hauling the man out and to jail. The cashier, at this point, had glomped Robin.

"THANK YOU SO MUCH!"

"...you're welcome," Robin replied, blushing slightly.

This is when the floating girl landed on the ground and pulled the cashier from him.

"Do not hug my boy."

"I don't think she meant anything by it, Star," Robin said.

The cashier surried away just as fast as she had glomped him. Starfire looked at Robin. She seemed slightly offended, but mostly jealous. Robin had a nack of having any woman latch onto him either giving him a hug or a kiss for saving their life. She rather disliked it and his attitude towards it wasn't helping either. They had been together for five years now and Starfire wasn't about to let anyone take her man away.

"But Robin, she was giving you the hug of thanking. Mates are not allowed the touch of another woman while with a woman on my planet."

"This isn't Tameran, Star, besides, I don't think Robin would ever cheat on you," came the pink hair girl's reply.

Starfire blinked before floating off. "I am no game, friend Jynx."

"Star!" Robin groaned before chasing after her.

"What was that all about?" the half man asked.

"The same. Robin was hugged. Starfire got jealous."

"Ah."

Jynx shrugged before leaving the store.

"What shall we do, Cy?"

Cyborg followed behind. Starfire was now sitting in the T-car, doors locked with Robin practically screaming at her that it was just a hug and nothing more. Cy groaned.

"Pizza?"

Instantly Starfire was out of the car.

"Did you say the pizza?! Oh how I would love an anchovies and mustard pizza!"

The three all looked at her blankly. Their attentions were all distracted as suddenly a black bird shape erupted above the tower. Instantly the four Titans rushed to their home.

googoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoog

A portal opened instantly. Two figures walked out of the crackling blackness before it disappeared all together. She wasn't much taller then before she left. Her hair was still the same style, still the same color. Brushing a few of her violet hairs from her face, she looked around.

"Hmm, they're not here. I guess we'll just have to wait, Aiden."

The boy beside her looked up, smiling. He had blonde hair which was much different then his mother's. Two violet eyes stared at him, but they weren't shaped like his mother's. They were like his father's.

"I see daddy?" he asked.

She nodded. Instantly the boy cheered, morphing into a black eagle before falling into his mother's arms in his normal form. She couldn't do anything but hug him, kissing the top of his head. Aiden snuggled up against her, trying to hide under her now white cloak. He yawned almost instantly.

"Sleepy?"

He nodded to his mother's question. She kissed him again before heading towards her room. Aidan was rather small for his age, but then again, his father wasn't that much larger either. The door opened almost instantly as she entered in the password. It wasn't much different then before. It still seemed rather clean. There were a few things out of place, but she knew that it was probably Starfire that kept cleaning it. She was pretty clumsy. Aidan was set down on the soft bed. He shuddered slightly, but his mother grabbed at a blanket. There was a few strands of green fur on it. She sighed instantly. He slept here. In an instant, she felt so alone standing there with her son sleeping. Where was everyone?

googoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoog

The Titans entered the tower. Nothing had been touched. They scrambled about, looking for, if anything, that was in the tower. Defeated, they went back to the living room.

"What the hell was that thing?" Cyborg asked, getting into the fridge.

"It almost looked like Friend Raven," Starfire added.

"Raven's been gone a long time," said Jynx as she took the soda from Cyborg's hand.

Cyborg growled before going back into the fridge to get another.

"It's not impossible, though. Raven could have sent us a message."

It was in that second that a small boy entered the room. All four looked at him, confused.

"How did you get in here?!" Robin asked.

The boy screamed, hiding under a table.

"Nice going, Robin. You scared him!" Jynx exclaimed, hitting him on the shoulder.

Starfire was the one to get on her hands and knees to look under the table. She smiled at the boy. He looked at her with his bright violet eyes. It didn't take long before he smiled back.

"I will not harm you. Do you want to come out?"

He nodded, crawling out. Starfire stayed on her knees as she looked at him as best she could in the eyes.

"Who are you, little one?"

"Aidan."

"What are you doing here, friend Aidan?"

He looked at the other Titans for a second before giggling. Starfire blinked.

"We're here to see daddy!" he exclaimed.

"Daddy?!" Cyborg and Jynx asked at once.

"Whose your daddy?" Robin asked.

Aidan wrinkled his nose and hid beside Starfire.

"I don't like him."

Cyborg laughed, nearly spitting out the Pepsi he had in his mouth. Jynx laughed silently.

"Aiden Logan! Where are you?!" came a scream as the door opened.

"FRIEND RAVEN!"

She was instantly tackled by Starfire and sent back out of the room. Aidan looked up before running over to Jynx and hiding behind her. He was giggling. Eventually Raven had pulled Starfire off of her enough to enter back into the room. She looked at the rest of the Titans, a smile on her face.

"Hey guys."

It was almost instant, but there came Cyborg, glomping her.

"Well, hot damn girl! Where the hell have you been?!"

Raven couldn't do much but laugh. She hugged the large man back the best she could. He eventually pulled away. Jynx just waved as she was pulled away by Aidan to play a game. Robin had a smile on his face.

"Welcome back. Are you here for good?"

She nodded. Instantly she looked around the room.

"Where is Beast Boy?"

Silence filled the room except from Aidan who was now playing a game with Jynx on the couch. Raven looked at them all closely. Two things popped into her head. He was either dead or he quit. She bit at her lip.

"Where is he now?"

"No one really knows. He bailed a few months after you left. We've been looking for him, but he left his communicator here. All we got was a note with some blood," said Cyborg.

"Oh."

"Don't worry, friend Raven. We shall find friend Beast Boy!"

Raven didn't say anything back to her. She looked over at Aidan before sitting down at the table.

"What did the note say?" she asked, her voice quiet.

Now it was Robin's turn.

"He wrote that he couldn't take losing you, too. After Terra, he couldn't love anyone again and that he did love you. After that, we haven't heard much of anything."

"The little stain got into a band. They hit it big and now he's just...gone."

Raven nodded to the both of them. Starfire had taken the liberty to join Jynx and Aidan. The three were playing Go Fish. Raven smiled as she watched Aidan. Robin instantly noticed the change of outfit color and the smile.

"Since when?"

"Since when what?" she asked.

"Since when could you feel?"

She paused shortly. She looked back over at him.

"Since Trigon no longer has any affliction over me."

Robin nodded. Cyborg suddenly handed her a small cup of tea. Raven looked at him with an eyebrow raised.

"Uh...we were out of pop one day. I tried it. Shut up."

She laughed at his sudden defensiveness. Raven tried it, finding it actually very sweet. She liked it.

"Mmm. It's very good."

"My own mix! I find if you mix Green with some hunny and sugar, it's not horrible."

She laughed. Suddenly Aidan jumped up, screaming.

"YOU CHEAT!"

"I do not!" Starfire exclaimed, more surprised then anything.

"Cheater! Mommy! She cheated!"

Raven shook her head. Aiden looked as if he was about to cry. He ran over to his mother and crawled into her arms.

"She didn't cheat, Ai. She just beat you."

Starfire looked downtrodden. She would never cheat.

"But...but..."

"Not everyone is horrible at Go Fish as me," cooed Raven.

Aidan sniffled, but nodded. He looked at Starfire.

"Sowwy."

"It is okay, friend Aidan."

Out of nowhere, an alarm went off. They all looked at each other. Raven nodded.

"I'll stay here for now."

"Titans, GO!"

googoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoogoog

This was the chance Raven needed. Quickly getting online and looking anywhere and anywhere for Beast Boy's band, she eventually found it. Much to her enjoyment, they were a local band and never really left Jump City. Cyborg and Robin must have been lying. She looked at Aidan as he looked out the large set of windows. He looked down at the water as it crashed against the rocks. Raven found them on Myspace. She listened for a second. It was amazing. She scrolled down to see what Beast Boy was doing. More to her surprise, she found that he was the lead singer, writer and guitarist. It was like a sudden hit. She always wanted a rockstar boyfriend.

"Aidan, we're going to a concert."

Aidan looked over at his mother as she stood. He smiled.

"Okay!"

"It'll be loud."

"That's okay."

Raven grabbed his hand before leaving the tower.

The music was indeed loud, but Aidan didn't mind it. He sat in the back with Raven as they watched one band just finish. They were horrible to her, but Aidan seemed to like them. It took a few minutes and several free drinks before the next band got onstage. Raven's eyes kept an eye on the green one holding the guitar. There was a beer bottle in one hand. Raven sighed. Just from reading his mind for a second could she tell that he was miserable and a drunk. There was nothing she could tell that made him happy except performing. Instantly the band started up with Beast Boy screaming into the mic.

"_I know the tears you're crying in your bed at night alone. I've cried those tears a thousand times. But those shallow empty songs about suicide are patronizing. You've got to learn to face your fears_."

The croud jumped up to the start of the song.

"_Or do you think I'll be less lonely when I'm dead. It can't silence all the voices in my head. I close my eyes but I can't make it go away. Do you think I'll be less lonely. God I pray that I'm not lonely. When I'm dead. When I'm dead. When I'm dead._"

Beast Boy's guitar went along with the song beautifully. He never moved from his spot. His eyes were closed as he sang.

"_When I'm dead I won't feel any pain. And when I'm dead I won't feel anything. When I'm dead. When I'm dead. When I'm dead. When I'm dead._"

His hair was much longer. Raven kind of liked it. Her heart jumped at the lyrics and his sudden change of emotions. She could sense the enjoyment and the deepness that the song was reaching for. She loved each second of it. It didn't take long before she noticed that his eyes were open as he scanned the croud. She held her breath. He screamed one last time.

"_I know the songs you're singing, saying nothing loud and clear. I've heard that song a thousand times. But your shallow empty lies about suicide are patronizing. You can never understand what I feel._"

It was in an instant as he noticed her and the flood of emotions. He never stopped singing though. His eyes were wide and looking dead at her. The crowd was still going crazy. She did nothing but smile.

"_Or do you think I'll be less lonely when I'm dead. It can't silence all the voices in my head. I close my eyes but I can't make it go away. Do you think I'll be less lonely. God I pray that I'm not lonely. When I'm dead. When I'm dead. When I'm dead. When I'm dead._"

The crowd cheered loudly and it was in that second that Beast Boy left the stage instantly. The smile faded from Raven's face. She looked at Aidan who seemed to be enjoying himself so much that he had fallen asleep. She gathered the child in her arms before leaving the place quickly and heading back to the tower. He would come to her. He'd be there when she arrived.


	2. your effervescent eyes have awaken me

Chapter 2 here for ya! Sorry for the long delay. Work eats my soul and I didn't really know what to write for this one. Heh.  
Well, here ya go for your reading pleasure! R&&R PLEASE!

Song: Waking Up Beside You - Stabbing Westward

**Disclaimer:** I still don't own TT or Stabbing Westward. But if I did...the world would end.

Chapter 2: _your effervescent eyes have awakened me_

Sure enough, three days later there was a knock. It was Raven who had opened the door. The others were out for an alarm. His eyes looked at the ground. Raven could tell that he could barely stand. She didn't know how he got there. Probably morphed. He looked up at her, his eyes blood shot. Alcohol lingered on his breath and his clothes. She wrinkled her nose. It didn't take too long before he collasped on the ground, passing out. It was now that Aidan popped up besides his mother as a small black puppy. His tail wagged until he saw Beast Boy lying on the ground. He changed back and looked up at his mother.

"What happened to him?" he asked.

"He's drunk. The idiot is drunk!"

Raven scowled before dragging him inside. She used her magic to slowly set him on a couch. Her hand ran over his face, her eyes set. Aidan blinked.

"He's green."

Raven smiled as Aidan wandered off. Her eyes watched Beast Boy's breathing. At least he was sleeping and not throwing up. She hated vomit. She even refused to clean up Aidan's. After a few moments of just watching him, she eventually called forth her powers to take him to her room. He groaned a bit, but stayed asleep. A smile couldn't help but to cross her pale face. As Beast Boy was rested on her bed, he seemed to cling for something as he smelled the sheets. There was a small whimper. This was almost like it used to be. She immediately slid next to him. His arm wrapped around her waist instantly, a small smile crossing his face.

"Mine."

She laughed slightly, trying her hardest not to wake him up. Everything about what he was doing was happening without him knowing. She knew this. Not everything was so simple. There was a sinking feeling that was rising from the pit of her stomach. Yet, she wasn't about to just quit with this moment. She had spent five years wishing that she could be in his arms or feel the way she did when his lips met hers. But five years is a long time. Had he forgotten them? She just let sleep take her until she heard him awaken.

----------------------------------------------------------

When the other's returned, Robin was cradling his right arm. He was cussing loudly as he entered the living room. Starfire was trying to fix it.

"OW! Damn it, Starfire! Let me see if it's either broken or sprained first!"

Starfire backed up, nodding. She felt a bit rejected. Aidan looked up from the couch where he was playing whatever game Cyborg last had in the Game Station 4. He blinked.

"Ummm...stupid man used bad words!"

"Stupid man?!"

Cyborg and Jynx started laughing hysterically. Jynx went to get something out of the fridge while Cyborg wandered over to see how well Aidan was playing.

"Yo, mini man. How are you do-THE LITTLE STAIN HAS BEATEN ALL OF MY SCORES!"

Aidan giggled, scratching the back of his head. Cyborg looked like was about to cry. He had to get them all back from a five year old. It was embarassing.

"Hey, Aidan, would you like a grilled cheese sandwich?" asked Jynx from behind the counter. "I'm sure Uncle Cy would like to get his high scores back."

"Okay!"

Cyborg took the controller as soon as Aidan set it down. He immediately started playing with any hope of beating all of Aidan's scores. Robin was taking care of his arm when he looked up.

"Where's Raven?"

Aidan was sitting on a chair at this point, watching Jynx make some sandwiches.

"She is with daddy."

"Daddy?" came four replies.

Aidan giggled. In a kind of teasing way, Aidan instantly transformed into a black raven. He flapped his wings and perched on Jynx shoulder to watch her cooking. Jynx didn't seem to really care or be shocked. She looked at him.

"You'll get feathers in the sandwiches if you don't be careful."

Robin and Starfire, however, where shocked. They looked at each other.

"Beast Boy?!"

Aidan looked over at them before jumping down and transforming back. He looked at them with a large smile on his face.

"He does look like friend Beast Boy!" Starfire shouted.

Aidan crawled back into his chair as Jynx handed him a sandwich. She rose her eyebrows. She already figured it out. What was everyone else thinking?

"Me and Cyborg figrued it out when Raven first arrived. Are you guys that dense?"

"I am not heavy," said Starfire.

There was a groan from Jynx before she started eatting her own grilled cheese. Aidan was smiling as he ate the sandwich. Robin was staring blankly at the boy, wondering why he didn't figure it out before everyone else. Aidan looked up at him, a glare on his face. Jynx noticed Robin.

"Uh...no one likes someone staring at them as they eat."

"Oh...sorry."

He eventually stormed off leaving Aidan to throw something at Jynx.

----------------------------------------------------------

As he woke, Beast Boy could smell the same scent that drove him crazy almost five years before. A smile crossed his face before he opened his eyes. There she was. She was passed out lying next to him. He slowly moved, careful not to wake her up. He instantly noticed the white outfit. Was she able to feel? It seemed like a dream the last time he saw her, the last time he was with her. The memories of that day haunted him until he eventually couldn't take it anymore. Could he still take it now? What if she left again? Quietly, he transformed into an eagle. Slowly he opened a window and flew out into the failing light. He had another gig tonight. She'd probably follow him.

----------------------------------------------------------

She felt a lot cooler. Raven opened her eyes and sat up. Beast Boy was gone. Her eyes wandered towards the window. He must have just left. Raven looked around before levitating out the window. Her eyes looked around as she sailed across the water towards town. In the distance, she noticed a bird staring at her. As she got closer, it dropped down on the streets and disappoeared. She landed and the music is what caught her attention. Slowly, she walked inside, scowling at the fact that she had to pay $15 to enter the damn thing.

"_I've been so alone for so long. Forgotten by the world. Forgotten to myself. Your effervescent eyes have awakened me. And brushed the dust away. But I knew you'd never stay_."

Her eyes instantly went up to the stage. There he stood, sober for once, looking directly at her. She knew that he was expecting her. She just looked back, watching him. Eventually, she wandered to a corner.

"_So I memorized the color of your eyes as I lost myself inside you. And I memorized the way our legs entwined as I drifted off beside you_."

His eyes closed. He turned away from her fully. There was another girl that he was looking at. She had brown hair. There was something that reminded Raven of herself, but this girl was smiling and blowing kisses towards him. He was just smiling back. Raven scowled. Was this what he was going to show her? It was disgusting.

"_I miss. God I miss. Waking up beside you._"

He looked back at Raven, giving her a glare. She could feel his anger. There was something that changed in him. This new girl looked over at her. There was a scowl across her lips. This one decided to walk over.

"_At night I cling to you, I'm so afraid. Afraid the day will come. And I'll wake and find you gone. But you promised that you'd not abandon me. And kissed my fears away. But I woke up to that day_."

Raven folded her arms across her chest. The girl placed a hand on her hip.

"You've got a lot of nerve coming in here and seeing B like this!"

"B?"

Raven shook her head. This was annoying. She didn't want to get involved with his current girlfriend. In fact, she didn't even want him to have a girlfriend. She was probably just one of his groupie girls.

"He's my man."

"Uh huh. Whatever."

The girl suddenly punched Raven. With an even larger scowl, she wiped a bit of blood away from her lip. The girl had gone too far now and it'd be Beast Boy that would have to pull Raven off this girl.

"_But I had memorized the way our eyes would meet reflected in the bathroom mirror. And I memorized your naked silhouette as you slowly brushed your hair_."

Somehow, Raven just laughed. She got right into the face of the girl and laughed.

"What's so funny?!"

"You are," Raven replied. "Do you have any idea who you are fucking with? Probably not. You look to stupid to understand."

The girl looked offended for a second before swinging another punch. Raven grabbed her hand this time, her powers now starting to kick in.

"_I miss. God I miss. Waking up beside you_."

"Wha-what are you doing?!"

With a smirk, she blasted her across the bar. She turned around to walk out when a blast of ice stopped her. Raven turned to look at the girl. Of course nothing would be easy. Why was everything so difficult?!

"Bitch."

She groaned. Not like she had never heard that before. This girl was annoying and making it even worse for her.

"Why don't you go back to your so-called man and leave me alone?"

"Afraid?" the girl asked, laughing.

"I don't want to rip you to peices."

"_I've been so alone for so long. I forgot how much it hurts. To wake up so alone_."

Another ice blast was thrown at her. Raven dodged it instantly. She didn't want to fight this girl so quickly. There were people around and most of them were now looking at the two. Beast Boy seemed to be singing with amusement now. He watched them, not stopping at all. He wasn't a fool. He knew that Raven could have killed his girlfriend in an instant. He was just seeing what she would do before he had a reason to attack her. Perhaps he could make her feel just like he did when she left him.

"_But I memorized how warm your body felt as you lay half asleep beside me. And I memorized the way the sunlight filled the room and played upon your body_."

Another ice blast and another dodge. Everything was getting really repeative. Eventually she levitated, darkness surrounding her. The girl smirked, her hands surrounded by a silvery blue glow as small flakes of snow fell from them.

"I thought Titans didn't attack innocent people."

"Who said that you were innocent?"

Raven moved, smirking. One of the girl's ice blasts had hit a man standing in a corner. She glared at Raven.

"You bitch! You made me do that!"

"Right. So let myself get hit? Right."

"_I miss. God I miss. Waking up beside you. I miss. God I miss. Waking up beside you_."

Ice was thrown at Raven again. This time, she blocked it, her dark energy heading towards the girl. This is when Beast Boy got involved. He transformed into a kangaroo, kicking Raven out of the air. She hit the ground with a groan. Her eyes looked directly at him. He just smirked, holding out his hand to the girl.

"No one attacks my Winter."

Winter let her powers fade. She rolled herself into Beast Boy's arms and smiled. Raven scowled. She immediately teleported out of there. Instantly Beast Boy pushed Winter out of his arms and went backstage. The girl looked at him in confusion, but followed.


	3. its hard to face the truth sometimes

Alright. Chapter 3 is here! The next chapter isn't really gonna be a chapter, but the infamous letter that I talk about in this chapter and the previous. Imma try to make it long, but we'll see! R & R PLEASE! BB AND RAE FOREVA! KEEP THE FAITH!

**Qwertymann: **You wanted some answers. I gave some. I'm not gonna leak everything yet cause that'll ruin the developing story, but I hope this gives you some. The next chapter is gonna explain Beast Boy more.

**Shameless Plug:** Go read my fiancee's story! War Birds by Mystic-Adversary! It's amazing despite the lack of BB&&Rae shipping. It's still amazing.**  
Disclaimer:** I still do not own TT or the songs by Stabbing Westward. I mayhaps own the storyline. COUGH_  
_**Song:**_ Sometimes It Hurts_

Chapter 3: _its hard to face the truth sometimes_

Raven stormed into the tower's living room, her fist clenched. Aidan looked up from where he was sitting on the couch with Jynx. A smile crossed his face.

"Hi mommy! Is daddy coming?" he asked, rushing over to her.

Raven sighed, looking at him. Immediately Jynx walked over to Aidan.

"Come on. Mommy needs to talk to Stupid Man and Cy. Let's go play hide-and-go-seek."

Aidan nodded, smiling still. He took Jynx's hand. They exited. Cyborg looked up at her. Robin stood next to her, arms folded across his chest.

"So when were you going to tell us that you were pregnant?" he asked.

Raven sighed, sitting down at the table.

"Oh, yeah. Just tell you all when a psycho was after me. Right. Not like he wouldn't have knew. Oh...by the way, I had a shitty day. Thanks for asking."

Cyborg smirked. Robin seemed to be fuming now. He glared at Raven.

"It's not like we don't love cryptic messages and a sarcastic tone enough, but could you please explain to us what happened?"

She sighed. This is when Cyborg sat next to her. He placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Something bad happened with BB, didn't it?"

She looked at him, tears in her eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me he changed?"

Cyborg bit at his lip. He looked at Robin who suddenly filled the tea kettle with water and set it on the stove. They knew what had happened, but for some reason, they never told her. It was a lot harder then they thought. Raven looked between the two. Was there something about that letter that she was missing? So many questions flashed through her head. Beast Boy was now no better then any other jack ass that she had met. What had happened to the guy she knew? Where was the Titan? Could that same rockstar be her beloved? It was Robin that spoke.

"After you left, he had started to change. He wouldn't come out of your room. He wouldn't eat unless we put the food in your room."

"Then eventually," continued Cy. "He just left."

Robin turned, a small piece of paper in his hand. He slid it across the counter to Raven.

"All that we found was this."

She slowly took it, opening it slowly. There was the familiar handwriting. It was horrible and Raven could never forget it. Her eyes skimmed quickly over the words. The tears never stopped falling. That was when something fizzed black and exploded behind them. The change was almost instant. The white seemed to be melted by the all familiar blue. Cyborg looked at Robin.

"Raven?"

She looked up at them, wiping the tears that remained on her face.

"He was the only reason I ever wanted to feel."

And now, that was gone. She stood, walking over to the window. It was Cy who followed her. He held up a CD. It was obviously a demo. Raven looked at it.

"What is that?" she asked in the all too rememberable monotone voice.

"We got this in the mail about a year in to the both of ya leavin'. It's his band's demo album. They're only big around here."

He pressed a few buttons and then a slot opened in his arm. He slowly put the CD in, pressing more buttons. It was almost instant when the music began to play. Raven stood there, trying her hardest not to cry despite the flood of sadness and betrayal she felt. She hadn't felt either of them in years. He wasn't supposed to end up like Terra. He wasn't supposed to be anything like her.

"_Six o'clock in the morning  
My head is ready to explode  
I can't believe I made it home alive  
I don't remember where I went  
Or what I was drinking  
And now it's made me sick  
And I'm not denying  
That I get this way  
When I try to get over you  
I get this way  
When I try to get over you_"

Cyborg had closed his eyes, humming along with the music. Raven watched him before she turned her violet eyes to look out at the sea before them. A couple of tears escaped from her eyes and slid down her face. They crashed upon the ground as the waves crashed onto the shore. There was a flash. She could see herself with Beast Boy standing on them. The wind was really strong that day. It whipped them hard in the face. Raven couldn't keep her hood up. He looked up at her from near the shore, a large smile on his naive face. She had grown to love that smile. The toothy grin was always made her smile now since she had admitted everything to him.

"I love you, Raven," he said, letting the wind push him closer to her.

She smiled a bit more. He had wrapped his arms around her.

"Ya hear me?"

"Yeah. I love you, too."

And as they kissed, the memory faded. Raven stared at that one spot, letting the music come out of Cyborg's built in CD player haunt her.

_"Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love  
Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love_"

Another tear and another explosion. Robin looked up from his spot as his Pepsi can exploded in mid-air. Cyborg looked at her. What had happened that she is back to her normal state? What did he do? Placing a hand on her shoulder again, Cyborg pulled her to face him. She simply looked away from him. Her eyes stared at the ground and focused on one spot as she tried to stop crying.

"_I tried so hard to hate you  
But it only makes it all worse  
I only end up hating myself  
And as my hatred grows  
So do the lies  
It's hard to face the truth sometimes  
God I feel so useless  
God I hate myself  
When I try to get over you  
I hate myself  
Will I ever get over you_"

'I hate myself,' she thought, wanting nothing more then to rip her hair out in frustration. Why had he changed? She had to leave. She was going to endanger everyone that she cared about. More importantly, she would hurt Beast Boy. Aidan wasn't fully the reason of her leaving. Slade was after her. He wanted her to destroy the city. Perhaps even the world. They had destroyed Trigon, but they couldn't destroy Slade?! So much pain behind her violet eyes.

"_Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love  
Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love_"

It wasn't like home was much more understanding either. Well, what was left of home. Raven's thoughts drifted as her eyes closed. The words straight from Beast Boy's heart was slowly breaking hers. She never meant to hurt him. She didn't leave just to leave. She was going to return. He wasn't going to lose her. 'Was five years too much?' she asked herself. Her emotions were bickering with each other. Slade was still out there. Returning was probably a bad idea. Raven knew this. She just needed to see him again. She needed to be with him. What had happened?!

"_And after all this time you'd think I'd understand the way you feel  
But no  
I only think about myself  
And it's driving you away  
I always knew it would one day_"

"Turn it off Cyborg."

"No," Raven said as Cy was getting read to do it. "Let it play."

"It's almost over, Rae."

"It's never over," she replied.

His hand lowered. Beast Boy certainly did a number on her. But right now, he had to be there for Raven. Beast Boy wasn't available for contact and at this point, he didn't know if he wanted to see him. Robin walked over. He handed Cyborg a cup of tea with honey and sugar. He offered one to Raven, but Cy shook his head. Robin simply walked over to the couch and sat down.

"What happened, Raven?"

"_Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love  
Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love_"

She looked over at Robin, pain visible behind her eyes. Cyborg had turned off the music by now. He sipped at his tea. Robin sipped at the tea in his hand. Everyone seemed to enjoy the stuff now. She eventually pressed a hand to the window.

"I had to leave in order to get Slade to leave me alone. I basically went home and hid. Took care of myself for the past five years alone."

"Alone? How did you-"

"It was painful. Let's not get into details."

Robin blinked, but continued to sip at his tea. Raven sighed. Aidan was all she had for five years. And for those five years, she promised to him that he would have a father. Right now, she didn't know if she wanted to even tell Beast Boy. Right now there was just so many unanswered questions on what happened to turn him from her.

"What happened with BB?" asked Cy, taking her mind off of her thoughts.

"Oh. Nothing. He didn't want to see me. That's all."

The tone in her voice was so neutral that Cyborg and Robin had a hard time telling if it really bothered her or she was lying. But somehow, they both knew that she wouldn't talk about it. They would have to find out some other way. Yet for now, Raven just took the letter that Robin had handed her and left the room. She needed time alone to decide what to do.

----------------------------------------------------------

Winter sat near Beast Boy. She was practically worshiping the ground that he walked on. Somehow, he was taking it up with every swallow of the alcohol in the bottle. He stared off into the distance as the girl talked on and on about how he was much better off without Raven. He ignored every word that she said. He wasn't in the mood to listen to her whiny dillusions of how they belong together. Earbuds rested in his ears. He looked at his iPod before turning it up. Winter noticed this. She stood, slapped him across the face and stormed out. He just shook it off and listened to the same song over and over.

"_Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love  
Sometimes it hurts  
So much to lose the one you love_"

He would drown out his sorrows tonight listening to the first song that made him a big hit. Perhaps tomorrow he would try to figure out what the hell he had done earlier. For some reason, the whole backing to it had no justice for him. There was still that empty pit in his heart and a growing want to hold her in his arms. Looking around at the empty room, a familiar voice hit him.

"She has hurt you so bad, Garfield."

He jumped up immediately, pulling the earbuds from his pointed ears. There stood the main source of his suffering. A familiar eye looked at him from the darkest corner of the room. His hands behind his back, he approached Beast Boy.

"I have a proposition for you."

"There is nothing you can do to make me want to work for you," he snapped back.

"What about forgetting you ever loved her at all?"

Suddenly it seemed all too realistic.

"For-forget her?"

If the mask was pushed away, there would be a smile across Slade's face.

"I could make you forget everything that causes you any pain."

He stood up straight, dropping the bottle in his hand. Beast Boy dropped to his knees in front of Slade and grabbed at his shirt.

"How? What do I have to do?"

"There is a child in the Titan's home. I want you to get in and kill him."

Beast Boy nodded. With that, he transformed into an Eagle and quickly left the room. Slade watched him go, a laugh following Beast Boy's departure.

"Soon enough, she will be mine again."


End file.
